Friday, October 03, 2003

*bleagh* Tests this saturday. And the next. And the next. So, this will prolly be the last update for awhile.

It's one of those times where your life is just like seeping away. Everything becomes black and white and grey and dead. You try to type something uplifting and nothing good comes out. And everything funny doesn't seem so interesting anymore. Conversation becomes trying, and school is like hell. And past actions keep coming back to haunt you. Even the Net is becoming bleak. Which has never happened before.

And I'm suddenly gripped by this fear that I'll be left totally alone when all my friends leave me for their studies. It will happen, I know. But I'm just really scared. All my best friends are leaving, one by one. It's like I have practically no one left here to talk to and moan to and just basically stick to. Alex is gone, so is Vic. And Ningz and Swees and Tzo and all... And they're slowly drifting away. I can feel it. We don't do the things we used to do anymore. We don't talk about the things we talked about either. Sometimes, I feel like I'm the only one left there reminiscing all the old times while everyone just moves on. And it gets lonely, sometimes...I look at all the old school photos, and I feel like crying. I really want to go back and relive those times again...And then you look at life now, and you just feel like puking. University sucks. It's killing me. So I'm a sentimentalist. I detest change. It's one of those things that's slowly chipping away my life. And I don't want it to happen. I want my friends back. I want to wear my school uniform and troop back to secondary school again. I want my friends back.


So. Shall take a break (of sorts) ^^;; Will be back soon enough to squeal about the Fab5 and Orlando and stuff soon enough *grin* You guys can look forward to some wallpapers when I come back *grin*

Till then ^^;;

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