Tuesday, March 26, 2002

hi guys. Sigh. I just got back my chem results. It was disgusting. Yeah, i Flunked it. T_T It's kinda like the 3rd time i've flunked a major chem test. This makes me wonder...what happened to all those 'never failed a test in my life' days when i was younger? You know, i've been failing so many times, i'm becoming jaded. The problem is, i shouldn't be, cos then it would be even harder to find the motivation to get good results. Yeah, the 'failure is the mother of all success' thingy. It's bullshit. When you fail too many times, sometimes you begin to wonder what is the whole point anyway?! Why the hell does my school set the world's hardest papers?! *sheesh* i know the answer to that too: it's to make us work harder for the final a-levels. But still!!!!


*sigh* i suppose why i'm still feeling so sad is cos i know that this time round, i was partly to blame. Yeah, i confess, i didn't work as hard as i planned to. But still, i did think that i studied hard enough -not- to get such a grade!!!! And the worst part? You can't really blame anyone. Nope. No one to point a finger to. No one at all! I mean, i could blame carelessness, or stress, but to the end, it's still about 'I didn't study enough'. And that is disgusting, cos after so many times, and i still haven't really done something about it. So i suppose i really have to do something now. Thing is, how to force myself to concentrate? hmm...guess i'd have to think on this.


You know, I did try to think of something: Last year, when i failed so miserably, i took down all my glay/luna sea posters. I told myself, if i did well this time round, i'd put them all up again. Hmm. Guess it just isn't working!


Ah well, i suppose no one reads this anyway, or you could help me out here ^^;; I suppose i sound like a major loser who's got herself stuck in somewhere and can't bring herself out again.


ok. I shall leave to wallow in depression for a while now...>.< Will post when i manage to feel better...^^;;; ja~

stardusted at 5:36 AM | link?

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